Monday, February 04, 2008

Newspaper Demographics

I am not the editor of a newspaper and shall always try to do right and be good so that God will not make me one”
Mark Twain, writer

I found this at Whiskey Talking and thought it was amusing.
    Newspaper demographics:
1.The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country.
2.The Washington Post is read by people who think they run the country.
3.The New York Times is read by people who think they should run the country and who are very good at crossword puzzles.
4.USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the country but don’t really understand The New York Times. They do, however, like their statistics shown in pie charts.
5.The Los Angeles Times is read by people who wouldn’t mind running the country — if they could find the time — and if they didn’t have to leave Southern California to do it.
6.The Boston Globe is read by people whose parents used to run the country and did a poor job of it , thank you very much.
7.The New York Daily News is read by people who aren’t too sure who’s running the country and don’t really care as long as they can get a seat on the train.
8.The New York Post is read by people who don’t care who is
running the country as long as they do something really scandalous, preferably while intoxicated.
9.The Miami Herald is read by people who are running another
country but need the baseball scores.
10. The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who aren’t sure if there is a country or that anyone is running it; but if so, they oppose all that they stand for. There are occasional exceptions if the leaders are handicapped minority feminist atheist dwarfs who also happen to be illegal aliens from any other country or galaxy, provided of course, that they are not Republicans.
11. The National Enquirer is read by people trapped in line at the grocery store.

6 comments:

sporksforall said...

I feel guilty about having canceled my La Times subscription. I do wish they'd stop firing the editors.

The Misanthrope said...

Hi Sporks, I am probably going to cancel soon. After I looked at their page 3 in the main section that about pushed me over the edge this morning. I've been thinking about it for a while because they are firing editors left and right.

Anonymous said...

I loved this. Wish I'd written it.

Anonymous said...

On the Mark says: When I saw Page 3 I said to myself, "You have got to be kidding me." What a joke.

Jack Steiner said...

That is pretty damn funny.

The Misanthrope said...

This was really very clever.