"Are you a magic feather? Because my heart just grew a tail, and flew away."
"If you were a warp tube, I'd be in you all day."
"Are you a magic mushroom? Because you are making me grow."
"Are you a magic flower? Because you are burning me up."
"I'd rather ride you than Yoshi any day."
"If Princess Toad looked liked you, I would have killed Bowser years ago."
"If I had the choice, I would gladly spend my 100 coins on you instead of on an extra life."
"You don't have to turn on a game to play with me."
"They don't call me Super for nothing."
By Christopher Doody, for McSweeney's
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